We've been having such a good time these holidays, the two little girls and I. They are so delightful and (mostly) so easy to be with that I am wondering why I am not spending all my time with them over the summer. There's not even enough time for me to do the things that I want to do with them over these few short weeks.
As they get older and both go on to school, I am thinking I might ask work if I can take the summers off without pay. I am sure they would agree, we are so quiet that I am getting pretty bored. But little kids are so cute and I want to be with them now! I might not like them when they are older and they definately won't want to be with me so why can't I do that now?
Maybe it is time to re-think work? I could join every parents' activity at school to secure Charlotte the best chance of getting in to Emily's phenomenal school. (Just wait, tomorrow morning they will be little horrors and I will long to get out the door on Monday!)
Friday 29 July 2011
Thursday 28 July 2011
Disability Living Allowance
Today I sent off Charlotte’s application for Disability Living Allowance (DLA).
I have been going through a lot of conflicted feelings about it in general and have put it off for over a year now. But that’s not fair on Charlotte so I have to do the best I can to secure her any money that she might be able to claim.
My conflicted feelings centre around guilt, that handmaiden of mothers everywhere: she seems so capable and is developing so normally that I feel guilty claiming disability for her, like she doesn’t need it and might be taking it away from someone who does. I counter that by remembering that she does have significant difficulties that will slow her down in life and she is entitled to support for them. I have been answering the questions on the application form based on her abilities when she is outside in daylight, without adaptive eyewear/assistance, I realise how helpless she really is and am grateful for the aids and support that she can receive. I also feel guilty for claiming benefits when we are a family with a good income.
I expect that she might be granted the middle rate of allowance which, at almost £50 per week, could quickly add up. My intention is to put it in a bank account for her and keep it as a nest egg/trust fund for her when she is older. She will probably have extra expenses in her life (eg sunglasses, taxis, living in central London, might find it difficult to find employment/a sugar daddy etc) so I hope that this money can make a little difference to her in the future.
Hence, my desire to put these benefits aside for her future and not fritter them away ourselves. I believe in the welfare state and universal benefits should be available to all regardless of means. Plus, family means do not always translate into future personal means and who knows what circumstances any of us may find ourselves in the future. I’m reminded of the Chinese proverb, “From rice paddy to rice paddy in three generations.”
I have been going through a lot of conflicted feelings about it in general and have put it off for over a year now. But that’s not fair on Charlotte so I have to do the best I can to secure her any money that she might be able to claim.
My conflicted feelings centre around guilt, that handmaiden of mothers everywhere: she seems so capable and is developing so normally that I feel guilty claiming disability for her, like she doesn’t need it and might be taking it away from someone who does. I counter that by remembering that she does have significant difficulties that will slow her down in life and she is entitled to support for them. I have been answering the questions on the application form based on her abilities when she is outside in daylight, without adaptive eyewear/assistance, I realise how helpless she really is and am grateful for the aids and support that she can receive. I also feel guilty for claiming benefits when we are a family with a good income.
I expect that she might be granted the middle rate of allowance which, at almost £50 per week, could quickly add up. My intention is to put it in a bank account for her and keep it as a nest egg/trust fund for her when she is older. She will probably have extra expenses in her life (eg sunglasses, taxis, living in central London, might find it difficult to find employment/a sugar daddy etc) so I hope that this money can make a little difference to her in the future.
Hence, my desire to put these benefits aside for her future and not fritter them away ourselves. I believe in the welfare state and universal benefits should be available to all regardless of means. Plus, family means do not always translate into future personal means and who knows what circumstances any of us may find ourselves in the future. I’m reminded of the Chinese proverb, “From rice paddy to rice paddy in three generations.”
Wednesday 27 July 2011
Scared of the dark?
How ironic!
When we were away recently, we arrived in the town after dark. Both children were a little overwhelmed to be arriving in a strange town and told to get out of the car in a church square to walk down the street (I love small town Italy!). When we got to the house, we took them out into the garden so they could see the stars - poor little London dwellers, never get to see the stars - but they were having none of it and just wanted to be taken inside.
I thought Charlotte would love to be outside at night but it appears that familiarity and security are more important to the almost-twos than being able to fully explore. I can wait until she is older to start our night time explorations together.
When we were away recently, we arrived in the town after dark. Both children were a little overwhelmed to be arriving in a strange town and told to get out of the car in a church square to walk down the street (I love small town Italy!). When we got to the house, we took them out into the garden so they could see the stars - poor little London dwellers, never get to see the stars - but they were having none of it and just wanted to be taken inside.
I thought Charlotte would love to be outside at night but it appears that familiarity and security are more important to the almost-twos than being able to fully explore. I can wait until she is older to start our night time explorations together.
Saturday 23 July 2011
Playing outside
We've been away recently and Charlotte was having a wonderful time playing in the garden. She spotted a ball across the lawn and ran after it, argued with her sister over who was going to play with it, won the battle and ran off with it. Earlier she was picking tiny flowers from the lawn and handing them to me - in full sunlight! It was wonderful, so encouraging. What parent of a blind child ever expects to be handed flowers like that? The red lenses from Noir were great, she wouldn't go outside without them and always asked for her hat too. She can now ask for and put on her own hat and sunglasses and a new word is "bight" (bright). She went swimming outdoors for the first time, she didn't want to get in but then she didn't want to get out and loved being tossed in the air and caught in the water! She ate gelato every day and pasta every night so all in all, it was a fab trip.
What was obvious is how she really can't see changes in the level of a surface. The garden wasn't completely flat and the slopes caught her totally off guard. She knew this and wouldn't venture outside without a hand (han') to hold. But she has proved herself sensible, adventurous and tough over and over again so she's doing just great!
What was obvious is how she really can't see changes in the level of a surface. The garden wasn't completely flat and the slopes caught her totally off guard. She knew this and wouldn't venture outside without a hand (han') to hold. But she has proved herself sensible, adventurous and tough over and over again so she's doing just great!
Friday 22 July 2011
OT: Discharged
We have been discharged from yet another service! Great news because Charlotte is doing so well, but on the other hand, I have found it really reassuring to go to these professionals to have them pronounce her fine and I am going to miss that kind of contact.
Charlotte sat there and performed every task in the test so well that it was a case of "what are we doing here?" What was remarkable was how she couldn't fathom a colour recognition test. She clearly didn't have the first clue what to do so it does show that for all her wonderful coping skills, she will need significant help in some areas.
Charlotte sat there and performed every task in the test so well that it was a case of "what are we doing here?" What was remarkable was how she couldn't fathom a colour recognition test. She clearly didn't have the first clue what to do so it does show that for all her wonderful coping skills, she will need significant help in some areas.
Saturday 9 July 2011
White cane travel
Paddington Station is quite the location for white cane spotting today, we've been here 5 minutes and I've already seen 2!
One of them was a Dad with his wife and two kids and they were clearly on a family day out. I find that so encouraging: he's got a partner, he's got children, they're doing regular stuff, he must have a job (because they weren't dressed in rags) and that is really the things I want in life for both my children. It's great to see blind people living normal lives.
One of them was a Dad with his wife and two kids and they were clearly on a family day out. I find that so encouraging: he's got a partner, he's got children, they're doing regular stuff, he must have a job (because they weren't dressed in rags) and that is really the things I want in life for both my children. It's great to see blind people living normal lives.
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