Friday 28 May 2010

Luckier than some

I have recently regained contact with an old friend who has been in my thoughts a great deal over the last few months.

We met when Emily and her little girl were just 3 months old. I was friends with her when her daughter was first diagnosed with Cerebal Palsy. They moved back to Australia before they witnessed my little girl sitting, eating, speaking, standing, walking, talking. They are still hoping to witness (some of) those milestones in their child's future.

Meanwhile, they work very hard to get her the equipment and services they want her to have. They travel to the ends of the earth for treatment and spend all their free time fundraising to pay for it all.

When we first learned about Charlotte, I started thinking about my friend again, she is the only person I know with a disabled child and I want to connect with others. But we hadn't kept in touch and I felt funny emailing. What would I say? "Hi, remember me? We have something in common now, my kid is disabled too, isn't that great?" Um, no. But then I got an email from them, a progress report to all their friends and supporters, it was a nice open door for me to send a note back, so I did.

They will be in the UK in July and we might have a chance to cross paths. I'm nervous about seeing how disabled their daughter really is, I saw that fear on my Mum's face when she saw Charlotte again.

We have it so much better than they do, Charlotte can communicate, will develop normally, is healthy, we expect to have a very normal family life and we can afford whatever she might need (and have a govt who would provide it anyway). I used to feel like I didn't want to feel grateful we aren't in a worse situation, I was jealous that I even thought about it at all, but I am grateful. Finally, at peace, and grateful.

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